“You know that point in your life when you realize the house you grew up in isn’t really your home anymore?” Why yes Andrew Largeman, yes I do.
More importantly, isn’t it depressing the day you realize your parents don’t know everything.
For me that day was long ago, and I’ve been trying to recuperate ever since.
Amongst this chaos the Beetle and I found each other.
You see the Beetle and I weren’t always besties.
In fact I think we kind of despised each other. High School is a tricky time for all…right? Anyway, at some point we decided that hanging out with each other was pretty legit.
We could help each other maneuver our parents and talk about how cute our jackets were at the same time.
I’m pretty sure the rest of our family thinks we’re weird, after all we can’t definitively pick a hair length or color.
So Beetle, here are ten reasons you’ve become the beats on the streets…
1) If we were to get into a gang fight in an alley, you’d be there to spout off obscenities and attempt to throw punches.
2) You’re the only person that truly wants to understand the saying, “the cheese stands alone”.
3) You’re the only person who understands me when I make Homeward Bound or Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen references.
4) You like to watch Lifetime while drinking wine.
5) You are petrified of ghosts like me, yet you record Celebrity Ghost Stories, and Ghost Adventures.
6) You think wearing sparkly shoes is awesome.
7) Your road rage is even worse than mine.
8) If the only thing to watch on TV was music videos you’d have no complaints.
9) You like my bear sweater (which by the way other people made fun of me for).
10) You really want to get one of those princess crowns with the ribbon coming down the back from the fair….and wear it around.
Keep on keeping on.
Spice Girls and Barney,
p.s. My pug just farted on me.
p.p.s. What up Papalaroogoo! Happy day of birth!